I am part of nature

written June 1, 2025. last in a series of three written on iPhone sitting in sun, mid day in backyard looking at the wildflowers listening to the birds and bees.

During COVID I frequently shared photos from my neighborhood walks and backyard. The reminder that I am part of nature was grounding in a time of human separation. It supported me in deeper closer noticing … how a wildflower would open over a day or two. How if I listened, really tuned in, all I could hear were bees on the rosemary. 

single rose with pink on edges of petals turning to yellow as nears bud. rain drops scattered. green foliage blurred in background. jdc San Rafael. 2022

And then life, death and all that surrounds it happened. I went inside - deep. I am solitary by nature, so going there is not a stretch for me.

What I didn’t expect was how challenging it would be to return to engaging with others. June 2024 until today has not exactly felt welcoming. And yet, those that preceded me experienced more than I could imagine and no attempt to erase that will make it not true.

So here I am, cautiously re-entering. I am trying to hold myself with care and compassion.

I have not been here before.