Somewhere en route from IAD to SFO. With no WiFi I don’t even know how many hours are left on the flight. Feeling suspended in time and space.
It also seems I had some things that at 30K were ready to emerge.
Over the past six months, a set of experiences with both individuals and individuals as representatives of organizations (consultancies and foundations) offered insights as to how we behave when we say we are centering equity, justice and liberation behind closed doors.
This set of experiences affirmed for me that there is a different way to be in this "work" and strengthened my commitment to continue to operate in a way in which my stated values, intentions and actions align. And as individuals we make choices.
As a reminder, I am a middle-aged Black cis-gender hetero-normative human who for most of her career has been self-employed, has not worked in a foundation, nor a non profit, and had a childhood that by most standards would be characterized as idyllic. I would have said before that I have no power, but I was told in no uncertain terms that was not true by a few folks quite adamantly, so I will own I have some influence which is a form of power.
The interactions referenced have for the most part been with people who have my cell phone number. They are not strangers.
One set of interactions were transactional, extractionary, with feelings of urgency often after-the-fact, and frequently full of assumptions and presumptions not made transparent. The other set were relational, invitational and from a place of how we might align and mutually advance shared aims. And even with a sense of urgency there was spaciousness in the specifics. What emerged from this spirit of co-creation were new ideas, a better understanding of shared context and potential paths forward.
What has been so amazing is that after one of the less attuned interactions almost within 24 hours an opportunity presented itself which activated my energy and filled my heart.
Arduousness countered with ease.
I do whatever it is I do because I am ill- equipped to do anything else (smile). And in all honesty I cannot imagine doing anything else. I will do it for as long as I am of service but it takes a toll.
So thank you to those of you who get me and choose to be in this -whatever it is - embracing new norms.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
I get you too.